I always knew about happiness needing to start within us. However, the application is very difficult if you have confused internal happiness with external happiness. Let's face it. We become happy if "this and that" happen to us. Something around us must cause our happiness, so we can continue the happy feeling. The only problem with this kind of happiness is... well... it can fade and the cycle stops.
To others, this is like the question of "Which came first? The chicken or the egg?"
Which came first? Happiness? Or the reason for happiness?
For the past few months, I noticed that I became happier when I started happiness within me.
You might be asking: How does that work? Shouldn't something be triggering the happiness for you to feel happy? Thus, there must be a reason for the happiness. You just don't feel happy automatically!
Of course, something must trigger you for you to feel happy. There must be a reason. But it must come from within. Not from outside. The outside is just a result of what happened within. That external happiness wouldn't have happened if the desire, that was sparked by your happiness, did not push you to act and get the good results!
So, to answer the question of "Which came first? Happiness? Or the reason for happiness?", I would say that, of course, the reason for happiness came first-- but it must come from within, for more happiness to come.
Family, friends, achievements, or success... They're external sources of happiness. If something happens to any of them, your happiness is also affected. So you cannot completely depend your happiness on them. You have to be INDEPENDENTLY HAPPY.
If you're unhappy within, imagine when you're at work. You come in to work feeling low because you're "just not in the mood". Do you think you'll be productive? You can't concentrate. You get irritated with everyone. You lose support. You make more mistakes. You lose your job. You become unhappier. You lose hope in finding another job because you lost confidence from your previous mistakes. You don't look for a job. No action. You drown further into sadness. And then you welcome more sadness into your life, until you can no longer get out of it.
NOW, if you come in to work very happy, people around you notice it. They get attracted to your positive vibes. They can feel it. You enjoy your day and you get to focus and work well on what you need to do. You give your best because you're just so happy and inspired. Tadah! Someone notices your potential and gives you a better opportunity.
So how do you spark the happiness from within? For the past few months, I was able to learn how to not confuse external happiness with internal happiness. I saw the results that if I started happiness within myself, I received more opportunities to become happier, and the happiness lives on and on.
1. MEDITATE/PRAY
- This quiets down the countless chatters in your mind. This gives you the chance to filter them out, and invite the positive thoughts in. Let all the positive and negative thoughts flow in, and then slowly choose which are the ones that give you inspiration and happiness.
Meditating relaxes you from worries. You focus on the NOW. You think of what you currently have. You feel calm, and then you start having good feelings. I love doing this early in the morning and right before I sleep. It keeps you energized throughout the day.
Plus, it strengthens your faith in God or the Higher Being you believe in. You feel grounded and connected.
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| CREDITS: UNSPLASH |
2. EXERCISE
- Some do not like hearing this word. You don't have to go to the gym, or do intense workouts to jumpstart those happy hormones! Even those simple morning walks and stretches can already give you the needed boost. I go to the gym, but I prefer doing runs with nature around me. You feel calmer, despite getting your heart pumping. It's a great mix of calmness and activeness.
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| CREDIT: skeeze |
3. EAT & DRINK HEALTHY
- As much as possible, eat and drink fresh products. Processed and junk food/drinks can definitely bring in toxic stuff to your body, and can alter you internally. So, do not underestimate the power of what you put in to your body, especially with the fact that happiness comes from WITHIN your body. A little bit of cheat days here and there, but as much as possible, have something unprocessed.
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| CREDIT: jill111 |
4. STAY IN CONTACT WITH NATURE
- We are naturally from nature. That's why when we say, "We're going on holidays!", most people I know, imagine the beach or nature trips. Sure, vacation may sometimes mean just staying at home, away from the busy life. But we feel more relaxed when everything around us is just natural. The calmness of the view of the sea. The sounds in the rainforest. It's a different kind of relaxation. Even a visit to the local park makes a difference. It breaks the environment of busyness and people just running around with their stressed pace and faces.
5. BE ACTIVE WITH YOUR HOBBIES
- Your hobbies are most likely sparked by your passion. In my case, I love to sing. So, I go to a voice school to study voice and enjoy the process. I record my cover songs and share them to the world. I meet other people with similar interests, and the passion grows. Then, I feel inspired and happy. It's what keeps me going during dull moments. So, start acting on that impulse of creativity to break the routine of seriousness.
6. FORGIVE
- Since the day we were born, it is impossible to say that no person or situation has hurt us. We're not perfect. We have emotions. We get hurt. It's okay to get hurt, but you have to let go of the pain and burden. Start by not blaming yourself, or anyone, or anything. Try to forgive day by day. Think of positive things about yourself/the person/the situation. Pray for yourself and for them. It may be difficult at first, but it gets easier after. Then one day, you'll wake up, and you realize you have forgiven the person/situation, and you feel happier.
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| CREDIT: diwero |
7. ACCEPT
- This is another difficult task to some. It takes days, weeks, months, or even decades. Accepting a situation as it is may be difficult, especially if you do not like it. But always remember that everyone did their best. I think that's the most important thing to remember. Everyone did their best. Let's just appreciate what has been done and what has happened, and realize that it is now up to us to improve the situation. Accept, and make it better.  |
| CREDIT: johnhain |
8. BE GRATEFUL AND LOVE
- This is the most powerful combination to trigger happiness. Gratefulness and love. By being grateful of what we currently have, we are reminded of how much blessings we have, and how great the results are from all the hardwork that we may not have noticed before and have only taken for granted.
We can start by being grateful for the smallest things in our life, then move on to bigger things. That's when we start to realize that there have been so many miracles in our life that were triggered, because we were inspired or happy during those moments.
When we realize that we received so many reasons to be happy about, we feel that we are loved by God or the Higher Being, as well as the people around us, because they are involved with our happiness.
We love ourselves. And then we send out more love.
By being happy because of gratitude and love, we affect our surroundings, and then we receive more reasons to be happy. It then becomes a cycle.
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| CREDIT: chrystalizabeth |
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So there you have it. These are some of the learnings I have realized and applied. The thing is, we know them. I knew them for a long time. But I forgot how to apply them during the times I may have stumbled.
It is easier to go with the flow of the negative vibes. It doesn't take much energy compared to positive vibes, which need A LOT of energy, effort, and action.
We all stumble. But we have to get up, and quickly recover before we get swallowed by all the negative emotions we feel from stumbling.
Happiness comes from within. And so does sadness.
We have a choice.
I choose to be happy. =)
